The thing with self realization is that you can never really feel your true self, that's why its called as a realization because it takes a different approach and effort to get inside the space where in you have to put sufficient efforts first to be able to experience it. I came across this on the internet (doesn't really matter where it came from, but here it is adding to the building blocks of my thought pillar): `"There is nothing, but the apparent experience of life. The person (me) is just a thought that comes and goes. Only that thought is believed to be real and therefore has control over what seems to be happening. That's the misunderstanding, which is responsible for most of psychological suffering."` To which I asked GPT to break it down for a 22 year old and this is what I was served with: `Alright, imagine you're watching a movie. In that movie, there's a character - let's call him Sam. Now, as an audience, you know that Sam is just a character portrayed by an actor. Even though you see him experiencing happiness, sorrow, anger, love, and so on, you understand that he's not real. He's a part of the story that's playing out on the screen. This understanding doesn't take away from the enjoyment of the movie; it just gives you perspective.` `In a similar way, life can be seen as a grand movie where you are the observer of your own life, or experiences. You might think of yourself as 'me,' the person who experiences all the ups and downs of life. This 'me' feels very real because you're deeply immersed in the story of your life.` `But the idea here is that 'me' is just like Sam. It's a part of the narrative. It's the character you're playing in the movie of your life. The 'me' is the result of thoughts and beliefs that come and go. It's not something solid or permanent. And just like how you're not really Sam, you're not really the 'me' either.` `This 'me' doesn't have control over what's happening. It's just a thought that believes it's in control. This is like Sam thinking he can control the movie plot. He can't, because he's just a part of it.` `The misunderstanding comes when you forget you're the observer of the 'me' and you start believing you ARE the 'me.' This is what can cause a lot of unnecessary stress and suffering because you start taking the story of 'me' too seriously, forgetting it's just part of the narrative.` `It's not about denying the existence of the character or the experiences, but rather recognizing that they are part of the unfolding story. This doesn't mean you stop participating in life, but rather, you engage with it from a different perspective, a perspective that brings a sense of freedom and peace. This understanding can help alleviate psychological suffering because you're no longer identifying yourself entirely with the ups and downs of the 'me.'` The thing I feel is that being in an observers body and not being aware about it is because awareness is ever existent in nothingness, and for being able to realize **nothingness** is to truly surrender (just like unlearning everything? well maybe partially correct.)